The Three Pain Pearls

According to the InnerLifeSkills methodology when a grain of sand gets into the shell of an oyster, it becomes an irritant to the oyster. The oyster reacts by coating the grain of sand with layers of mother-of-pearl. The grain of sand transforms into a beautiful and valuable pearl.

Your personality forms around an “irritant” or pain. There are THREE core irritants that human personalities develop around:

  1. ANGER
  2. SHAME
  3. FEAR
Just like the oyster coats the grain of sand with layers, so do we coat our core irritant with layers of personality. The oyster transforms its core irritant into something beautiful.This is what the Enneagram allows us to do. Working with the Enneagram and understanding the layers of our personality, allows us to transform our pain.This is how the personality gets formed.

YOUR DEEPEST PAIN CAN BE TRANSFORMED INTO THE MOST VALUABLE THING YOU HAVE TO OFFER THE WORLD.

You just need the right tools.

OUR CORE IRRITANT CAUSES PAIN AND SUFFERING, the personality is formed as a way to cope with this pain. It is essentially a defence against our pain. The more we defend, the more we begin to believe that this defence is who we really are. When we begin to observe ourselves, we realise that this is not who we truly are. We are more than our defences.

YOU ARE MORE THAN YOUR PERSONALITY.

Just like the grain of sand can be transformed, we can transform our pain into the most valuable gift we have to offer. When we can begin to identify and let go of our defence against our pain pearl, we can begin living as our true selves. We can transform our grain of sand into a beautiful pearl. Each of us has formed a defence against one primary feeling; fear, anger or shame.

Even though we are all familiar with all three of these feelings, we each have one that we always seem to come back to. This is our “pain pearl”. With the right tools, we can transform our grain of sand into a beautiful and valuable pearl. Your Enneagram Type formed as a defence against your core irritant.

There are nine distinct ways in which this happens, and these form the 9 Enneagram Types
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T
A
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Every time you transform a pattern, you come home to yourself.